I’ve Got A Secret

telling a secret

I’ve got a secret. So do you. Little do we know, but it’s the same secret. We may as well just name it…I DON’T HAVE IT ALL TOGETHER! Not my home, my marriage, my relationships, nor my life. And neither do you.

Rumi called it the “Open Secret.” We’re all keeping the same secret.

The secret struggles. The secret doubts, imperfections, confusion. The second-guessing ourselves, questioning our actions or inactions.  We answer, “How are you?” with “Fine,” rather than share the truth of our frustrating day, our worry for our rebellious child, our bewilderment over our marital issues.

By hiding our realness, we unintentionally rob ourselves of opportunities for meaningful connection with others. We feel alone in our struggles, isolated in our problems, convinced that everyone else “has it all together.”

Well, the secret’s out. Not one of us “has it all together.” Thank goodness. Now we can get on with our lives and allow ourselves to really get to know each other.

One of the most fulfilling aspects of my work is bringing a group of women together – for a workshop, retreat, or coaching circle – who very quickly realize, “I am not alone!” I hear the nearly inaudible sighs of relief, followed by comments like, “I can’t believe you feel like that too.” “I had no idea others thought that. I assumed I was the only one!”

We make heartfelt, authentic contact and provide the validation that we so desperately need. We empathize and feel compassion for one another. Which, in turn, helps us to feel more compassion for ourselves.

Today, will you offer another woman a glimpse of who you really are? Will you share the truth of your perfectly normal imperfect life? What a difference this could make in shifting someone’s misbelief about their own inadequacy.

On Saturday, April 12th, we have the opportunity to gather together. To spend a few hours in community, getting real. I’ll be hosting a “Wholy You” workshop at the Daylesford Abbey in Paoli, PA. Click here for the details. Click here to register.

Come. We get it. We get YOU. I would be honored to have you there.

With love,

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Join the conversation!
  1. Kim says:

    As always, I love what you share…it’s so evident that it comes straight from your heart. So, thank you.
    As I read what you wrote, I immediately thought of lyrics from a song I love by John Legend, where he says, “I love your curves and all your edges, all your perfect imperfections…” It is a rare and special thing to feel the safety of a love like that. We need to breathe more of that into the world.
    Wish I could join your workshop, but I have a workshop that day as well…blessings and thank you for all you do. One day God will reveal to you the ripple effect your love and passion/compassion have had on the world.

    • De Yarrison says:

      Wow, Thank you for that beautiful thought about the ripple effect from my love and compassion. I do believe that as I do the work God guides me to do everyday, that lives are being impacted in ways I will never know about. And you too, are sending our big ripples. Thank you.

  2. Something I am learning as I get older is that nobody has their stuff together! Thank you sdo much for validating my feelings! 🙂

  3. Kay Kathleen says:

    Couldn’t agree with you more!! Boy, if I lived closer, I sure would love to come to your workshop! I bet a lot of ladies will be elated to discover that the cat’s out of the bag on the whole “got it together” thing!!


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